Crippled Contents

I wanted you to stitch the torn pieces of me back together

Sew the shredded fragments of ripped reliance so that I’d be whole again

I just knew that if you ran your fingers across my seams they’d be invisible because perfect was you

Even the sky admitted it…

The rain fell gently, the wind whispered your name

The sun resented your glow

You were art and I craved your brush’s stroke

But we traded heartbreak instead…

Your courage was ragged too

The dark clouds obscured a bruised psyche that quietly complimented my flawed existence

We were balanced destruction…

Equally ravaged and mentally vandalized

Our defective ways fulfilled an eternal bond

Epilogue

Bona fide allegiance we painted the ideal picture. A sculpted silent charade, Da Vinci’s Mona Lisa. The art of we, internally you hardened to me…

Like arteries you were carried away from my heart. The weight of defeat made it hard to breathe, I was the vein on the way to your heart. 

But I’ll wait in vain, again for you to proclaim my heart. Never to parade on your depart, I gave you my whole and not a part. The affection of our connection was subjected to infection. To solemnly speak, we fought for peace. At war in our fort that was concrete and complete, now drilled down to a bit and a piece. Dynamic duo, we were a manic dual unable to battle our leukemic duel.

Ugly

You negate the rejection of the very flaws I rejected in me, discreet…that’s how I kept them. Swaddled in smiles and secured in artificial sureness, absent was the superficial beauty that handicapped guys like you. I externally disabled the angst and uncertainty but internally I was dying to breathe…dying to live up to your standards but inferiority suffocated me. The degradation of unattractive was crippling, but this facade said something different…I had two faces and every morning the one staring back at me felt unworthy. Yet I put my mask on and quietly count each step in my pace, praying my knees don’t buckle and my legs won’t give way…